The Reality of Being the “Sick Kid”…Again

Today at work it hit me (I’m also now realizing how awkward this might be if my coworkers are reading this, but oh well). Tomorrow is the day that there is a huge indicator that I’m sick. I found out my UC was active again my second week at this job and since then I’ve made it my task that my coworkers shouldn’t be able to ever tell. The only reason I wanted them to know anything that was happening was my talking about it casually. I don’t act sick, I make sure I don’t look sick; I don’t want to be treated like I’m sick. That being said, tomorrow is the day I get a PICC line place for my future infusions. As much as I try to hide it, I know it’ll still be obvious to others that its there.

In high school, everyone knew I was sick. I looked it even though I tried my best not to act it. So when I had a PICC line it didn’t matter, people already knew. There was even a section in my yearbook my junior year dedicated to my surgery and me. This is a whole new ball game for me this time around.

My mom broke it down to me earlier today. Either I can completely ignore it and act like it isn’t there or I can joke about it. She’s right. When it comes to being sick we have 3 options: (1) let it completely control us, (2) ignore it, or (3) find a way to laugh about it. UC and other diseases like it have its tendency to embarrass us at the worst times. It takes some time but learning to laugh at yourself makes this whole process so much easier! It’s not easy; it’ll never be easy. There’s absolutely nothing I can do to change what I have to face in the next few months so if I intend on making the best of what I got.


The timing is horrible, I’m incredibly frustrated, and what I thought was going to be a quick fix is going to take a lot longer than I originally planned for. But this isn’t a death sentence and I’ll be damned if it changes me. I let this disease dictate my life years ago and I promised myself I’d never let that happen again. 
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